miCRo: “Devotee” by Shlagha Borah

Managing Editor Lisa Ampleman: I’m impressed in this prose poem by the devotion of the mother to her religion, even as she’s treated poorly by men, and by the devotion of her daughter, who records the events. The juxtaposition of holy sites and vile acts creates a deep irony, but the strength of the mother’s faith literally moves the poem along: the temples described are about two days’ travel apart from each other.

Listen to Shlagha read “Devotee”:

Devotee

When terrain changes, you’ll know you’re closer to god. At Jagannath Temple, after climbing dozens of flights, my mother stops breathing. The priest pulls her arm; her headwrap slips to the floor. Milk and rose petals turn the color of ash, stomped on by hundreds of devotees. She is winded and panting. The priest guffaws, the temple his abode, his thread intact across his belly, even in the stampede. There are many ways to be reverent. He rubs himself on my mother’s back while she struggles for air. The three gods don’t meet her eyes. At Pushkar Lake another priest calls her Ma Annapurna, the goddess of harvest. He asks for five grand so he can bless her womb. A son, he says. When she refuses, he calls her a whore. He curses her to be barren. Her daughter records this on the Sony Handycam. Her daughter records this. My mother has never been good at running. At Tirupati Temple she stands in line overnight, and a man runs over her when the gates open at midnight. Her thighs are bruised, yet she staggers to the gold deity. No one is allowed to look into the god’s eyes. When she stands in line for prasad, starving after twelve hours of fasting, the priest offers her his cock. What makes one a boar, a god? Her gods refuse to answer.

Shlagha Borah (she/her) is from Assam, India. Her work appears or is forthcoming in ANMLY, Bat City Review, EcoTheo Review, Salamander, Nashville Review, Florida Review, and elsewhere. She’s an MFA candidate in poetry at the University of Tennessee, Knoxville; the reading series coordinator at Sundress Academy for the Arts (SAFTA); and an editorial assistant at The Offing. She has received support for her work from Brooklyn Poets, SAFTA, and the Hambidge Center. She is the cofounder of Pink Freud, a student-led collective working towards making mental health accessible in India.